Sheila Coates was no ordinary woman, although she thought she was. One evening, she prepared dinner like she had done every other day in the twenty-five years since she’d married. Her sister dropped by and watched as the then- 42-year-old homemaker and teacher’s aide cooked, pulled down the dishes, cut the food into portions, put the food on the plates, buttered the bread, and even salt and peppered the corn for her husband and three sons.

“Are you going to eat it for them too?” her sister asked. Coates looked at her, dumbfounded.

“How old is Leo?” her sister inquired.

“Sixteen,” Coates answered.

“He’s not a baby,” her sister said. “Why are you doing this for your sons?”

That was the moment when Sheila Coates woke up. She’d found her moment, and maybe, when you see what she and the other women mentors in this book did with their moments, you’ll find yours. After her sister challenged her in her kitchen, Coates found her power as one of America’s most revered advocates for African-American families—a woman whose influence has stretched from the home to Congress to the White House. “It was the catalyst for the change,” Coates remembers. “I reevaluated my life. I never realized how frustrated and unhappy I was. Not only was I concerned about my own frustration, but I was teaching my three sons to be dependent on women. I couldn’t live like that anymore.”

After that discussion with her sister, she became serious about changing her life, quit her job and went back to school full time to study public administration and pre-law. She took a required course in organizational theory, which taught her how to turn issues into action. Coates emerged at the forefront of a powerful group of activists for African-American families, founding Black Women United for Action, an Arlington, Virginia–based community service organization with ties throughout the United States, in Africa and in Canada. The organization focuses on improving the lives of vulnerable families, and as its leader, Coates has testified before national committees, spoken at the White House and consulted on public policy with White House staffers, cabinet members—even the vice president. In addition, she has served in a succession of gubernatorial appointments and fought relentlessly to make a difference for others.

She changed her life in a decade by knowing what she wanted. Her mother had long taught her that the sky was the limit and Coates saw education as her vehicle to free flight. In her studies, she learned that 80 percent of the people in the world want to be led. Twenty percent will help out in the core action group, but only 10 percent will be actual leaders. Coates wanted to lead. “It would have been easier to walk out the door and say, ‘Hell, I’ll go get a real job.’ But there was this nagging piece, the ‘what if’ piece. What if I do that? Once I made up my mind, that was it. A lady once told my mother I’d go bear hunting with a switch. I was that fearless.”

She remembers coaxing a caterer into helping her put together a fundraiser with just $8.22 in her organizational treasury. She was asked what the group had to spend. “I said, ‘$8.22, so you can’t spend over $6,000 for catering.’ ” One man who watched her finesse the arrangements said, “Don’t even try to figure it out. It’ll be done.” Her colleague said, “This doesn’t even make sense, but I’m going to stay with the group just to see. There’s no way she can do it.” The event took in $32,000, with $16,000 in profit. All out of $8.22. “You can do some crazy things when you believe,” Coates says. “Every human being on this earth has a purpose. Everyone has something they can give. The need is there and you rise to the need.”